I can't remember the title or author, and I've tried to find the book since then but attempts to search the web or Amazon for "grief and guilt" aren't turning up any likely candidates. (For one thing, I suspect most books about grief address guilt in some way.)
Can you help?
Disclaimer: Nothing bad has happened in my life or to any of my loved ones. I just suddenly realized that the "guilt = wish for things to be better/different" is a good way to frame the social angst that I wrote in a recent (locked) entry. I want to look at the book again to see if its insights can be applied in this way.