http://harrietbrown.blogspot.com/2007/07/take-love-your-body-pledge.html
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serenejournal and
sistercoyote
I certain am happy to pledge that I won't "call myself a fat pig, gross, or any other self-loathing, trash-talking phrase," except in mockery of such phrases or as a way of describing an inner landscape I don't agree with and want to change.
The part I won't promise is not to talk about how fat my thighs or stomach or butt are. Because promising that in the context of a promise not to talk trash about my body implies that I'm broken if I have fat thighs or stomach or butt. And I don't agree with that. My thighs and stomach and butt are fat, and there's nothing broken about any of them.
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I, your name here, pledge to speak kindly about my body.The point of this pledge is to "change the way girls and women talk to themselves and others about their bodies." I like that. I'm all for changing how body-hatred talk becomes an automatic bonding ritual among women that IMO ends up damaging our self-esteem and reinforcing a negative tendency to view our bodies as tools and vehicles to be manipulated instead of, well, us.
I promise not to talk about how fat my thighs or stomach or butt are, or about how I really have to lose 5 or 15 or 50 pounds. I promise not to call myself a fat pig, gross, or any other self-loathing, trash-talking phrase.
I vow to be kind to myself and my body. I will learn to be grateful for its strength and attractiveness, and be compassionate toward its failings.
I will remind myself that bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and that no matter what shape and size my body is, it’s worthy of kindness, compassion, and love.
I certain am happy to pledge that I won't "call myself a fat pig, gross, or any other self-loathing, trash-talking phrase," except in mockery of such phrases or as a way of describing an inner landscape I don't agree with and want to change.
The part I won't promise is not to talk about how fat my thighs or stomach or butt are. Because promising that in the context of a promise not to talk trash about my body implies that I'm broken if I have fat thighs or stomach or butt. And I don't agree with that. My thighs and stomach and butt are fat, and there's nothing broken about any of them.
Comments
At least, that's how I took it. :)
Body acceptance is as much about not telling the thin or average person to eat a sandwich/cheeseburger/whatever as it is not telling the fat (or average!) person they need to go on a diet.
And I'm really worried about how you're going to take this comment, for some reason.
Stef, you have a prickly but lovable soul and I know bodies get in the way
for a woman (if you play the game honestly). This is stuff I avoided in
our email friendship, and I have had a bit of an education in women since,
just two things to add to this which you seem to keep a lid on.
1. If your body doesnt match the beauty of you soul, don't let the ugly seep in by osmosis.
2. Don't let acceptance of the imperfect vehicle, nature/god/the great pumkin gave you as the key to getting on with life and keeping your chin up, become an excuse for a junk food, smoking, drug or couch/mouse potato
habit.
habit.
If I'm worthy of kindness, compassion, and love, then I'm also worth taking good care of. Taking good care of someone means giving them the sort of environment—with the right balance of nourishment, exercise, challenge, rest, and recreation—that allows them to flourish.
It also means not allowing other people's superficial judgements to substitute for my own judgement of what that proper care might be. Usually when I see people decrying "junk food" or "couch potato habits," they are superficially judging others on appearance alone.
If I were to alter anything about this pledge, it would be changing:
I promise not to talk about how fat my thighs or stomach or butt are, or about how I really have to lose 5 or 15 or 50 pounds.
to
I promise not to talk about how horrible my thighs or stomach or butt are, or about how I really have to change them to feel accepted in society.
As for failure to function, I think it's allowed to grouse about that. Actually, sometimes I go all silent about such things for a long time, and that's pretty actively bad for me.
--Harriet Brown
harrietbrown.blogspot.com