Stef (firecat) wrote,

conversations with thought balloons

Have you ever had a conversation like the ones in comic books where you are saying one thing and thinking something else, and the words are in a smooth round balloon with a pointy bit hanging down and the thoughts are in a different font, in a bumpy balloon with three circles hanging down?

I had some of those today. My Prius's driver side headlight was out so I took it to the dealership for replacement.

Service advisor thought balloon: Oh dear, all my customers bitch about how expensive headlights are, so I had better do this song and dance about how other kinds of headlights are even more expensive, to distract her.
Service advisor says: "You're lucky that you don't have the blue high definition headlights. They cost several hundred dollars to replace. This type of headlight is on the cheaper end."

My thought balloon: He's trying to distract me. Shit, this is going to cost a bundle.
I say: "Cheaper is good."

Service advisor is printing out estimate. Thought balloon: I'm siiiinging in the rain, just siiiinging...
SA says: "Did you know that on Mercedeses and Lexuses, it costs $1500 to replace the headlights?"

I say: "People who buy Mercedeses and Lexuses are paying for the privilege of paying more."
My thought balloon: This is a real Busby Berkeley special

The estimate is for $125. I sign it and leave. Several hours pass. The SA told me the car would be ready by 1pm so I call at 1:10pm and after being put on hold for five minutes I am informed the SA is out to lunch and the car isn't ready. I go home and take a very long nap. When I wake up there is a voicemail.

SA voicemail, timestamp around 2pm: "The car IS READY. I apologize that I didn't have a chance to call right when it was ready, but I was doing something else and I wanted to let you know the car IS READY."
SA thought balloon: Eep, I fucked up. I had better use my special 'patronize the middle-aged lady voice'.

I go to the dealership. When I enter the service area to wait for my car to be driven up, I see the SA across the parking lot. He holds his arms out and shouts
SA says: "Did you get my voicemail?"
SA thought balloon: Maybe I can make her think it's her fault for not returning my voicemail.

I hold my thumb up.
My thought balloon: Of course I got your voicemail, that's why I am here, isn't it?

SA comes closer and says: "Yes, they told me 'your customer called!' and I was out, yada yada."
SA thought balloon: Commencing 'confuse with lots of words' mode.

I say: "It would have been convenient to pick it up at 1pm, but after that I had some things to do, so yeah."
My thought balloon: Why were you out precisely at the time you promised the car for? And why did you lie about when it would be ready? It's not like I asked for the car to be ready at 1pm. I just wanted to know when it would be ready.

At least I got a sorely needed car wash into the bargain.
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