If you have chronic pain, you do probably know these things, but it can be helpful to be reminded you're not alone. And I thought it was a very good summary for people who don't have it and want (or need) to understand better.
I particularly liked this bit:
You may have only asked your chronic pain spouse if they would like to go to a movie, but in their head they have considered if they can sit still that long, how much medication it would require, if they have the energy, if they will stay awake through the movie, how high their pain is now and how it might increase, if they go will it make getting through tomorrow harder, and most importantly, given all this, will it be any fun. They didn’t grouch at you for the fun of it, pain just makes it very hard to remember that everyone else is coming from a totally different perspective, where a movie is just, well, a movie.And this.
You can’t do what you want to do with your time even when you try and it seems like everyone is mad or unhappy with you no matter your efforts. ...Most pain sufferers blame themselves for these failings, remembering that they used to be able to do everything. They see chronic pain as a sign of weakness or a personal defect that they should be able to overcome.And this.
Pain causes isolation. When you’re in constant pain the last thing you want to do is attend the company party, the neighbor’s backyard barbecue, or even small gatherings with your closest friends and family. Your friends and family are still the light of your life, but the physical and mental energy it requires to go out and be social can be just too much to handle. You start to bow out of parties and cancel plans, not because you don’t want to go, but because you just can’t. Eventually people stop inviting you, calls to make plans decline, and the scary thing is you don’t mind. The pain has slowly, but surely, isolated you.The article doesn't mention emotional/mental pain that is primary rather than a result of physical pain, but in my experience it has the same effects.
There are some excellent comments, including comments from partners/caretakers.
This entry was originally posted at http://firecat.dreamwidth.org/839613.html, where there are comments. I prefer that you comment on Dreamwidth, but it's also OK to comment here.